Ricotta Pesto Pasta

It's good to have stuff on hand that I can prepare quickly when I get home from work.  I decided to make some cheesy-pesto "sauce" for pasta, and put it in the freezer in small baggies.  All I have to do is think ahead enough to defrost them before dinner, and I can cook up the pasta to have with it.  The finished product of this could use a little more salt, and possibly a sprinkling of freshly grated Parmesan.  I encourage you to play with this sauce and make it better.  If you come up with something awesome, let me know. 

I am an idiot, and I got mixed up, and I labeled these as "Pesto-Risotto" sauces.  Not risotto, ricotta

Ricotta Pesto

1 cup prepared pesto

4 cups Ricotta (fat-free or not, whatever you want)

1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese

Salt and pepper to taste

* Warm water from pasta (just enough to make the cheese mixture a saucy consistency; add this when you're serving it, not before you freeze the baggies.  It'll heat up the cheese mixture a little, and give it a saucy consistency.)

Mix the ingredients in a bowl.  Divide into freezer packages, or use it all at once.  Save some of the pasta water from cooking your pasta and add a small amount to the cheese mixture to get to a consistency that seems right to you.  Add hot, drained pasta to the mix and stir it up. 

Add salt and freshly grated Parmesan if you like, and let me know if you perfect this!

Eggs, Baskets, and Roller Coasters

When it comes to treating my chronic upper back pain, I have learned not to put my eggs in any baskets.  For nearly 20 years my back has hurt just about every day.  For over eight years I have been seeking help from medical professionals.  In the past two years, I have tried a couple of physical therapists, message therapy, anti-inflammatories, steroids, anesthetic patches, a TENS unit, cortisone injections, neck traction, shoe inserts, and a special diet.  Thus far the pain has remained pretty much unchanged: nagging, depressing, and often quite debilitating; like an abusive Siamese twin.

With every new doctor or physical therapist, I’ve ridden the same roller coaster of ups and downs.  On the first visit, we chat about my pain experiences, they look over my spine, they notice the slight curvature and uneven pelvis, they point out the protracted shoulder blades, and they come up with what seems like a very logical explanation for the pain and suggest what sounds like a very simple and achievable solution.

At first I’m super encouraged that “this one” truly understands me and I’ve finally found someone who can help.  I faithfully and zealously do my exercises, taking copious notes about all the nuances of my pain.  Weeks turn into months as I obsess over the details of my stretches and the location, intensity, and persistence of my pain.  But there is no change. 

This month, I started seeing another new physical therapist.  She’s got some serious credentials and a lot of expertise.  Talking to her, I can tell she really knows her stuff. She’s fascinated by my atypical symptoms and curvature, and she’s up for the challenge of finding a solution.  Could this be the one?

While she’s finding the same structural problems in my skeleton that previous doctors have seen, she’s suggesting a new plan of attack.  Her reasoning sounds entirely plausible.  Could she be the one?

Forgive me for lacking optimism.  Most of my eggs were shattered in previous baskets, so I’m leery of entrusting the remaining ones to any container, no matter how appealing it may be to do so.  I admit that this woman’s approach seems very promising.  And while I’m in her office being worked on, I feel like she’s making a difference.  But I also thought that I’d found the solution eight years ago at the first place I went to.  And it seemed that two years ago we were really on to something.  And last year’s cortisone injections seemed like a sure solution.  And everybody raves about those TENS devices.

I guess it’s just hard to fight the combined effect of disappointment and fear of more disappointment.  I want to be optimistic and hopeful.  But I’ve been let down so many times – abandoned and left with this abusive Siamese twin – that I simply can’t convince myself to expect anything good.

When I try to be optimistic, I only feel like I’m deceiving myself.  Like making a birthday wish you know will never come true, I just don’t have much hope in the power of optimism.  This time, this physical therapist may be able to help me.  But I won’t believe it for real until I see it for real.  Try as I may to muster up the positive vibes, I just can’t be sincere about it.  I’m keeping my eggs in my hands while I ride this roller coaster one more time.

We’ll see.  I’llkeep you posted.

Tasty Earthy-Crunchy-Healthy-Hippie Molasses Cookies

I’ve been refined-sugar-free for about a month, and yes I’ve had dreams wherein I have devoured cannolis the size of burritos.  So far, I’ve satisfied my sweet tooth mainly with dried fruit, nuts, honey teas and banana bread.  But it’s time to pig out on cookies.  So here we go. 

I found this recipe on the interweb.  I made some alterations to make it suit my hippie wannabe desires. These things turned out to have a very pleasantly strong molasses / gingery flavor.  I think they will go wonderfully with my 10 a.m. breaktime coffee at work.  And with the exception of the shortening, they are super healthy!  (Even vegan!)

Molasses Cookies:

1/2 cup all purpose flour

1 cup whole wheat flour

1 cup wheat germ*

1 tsp ground cinnamon

1 tsp ground ginger

1 tsp baking soda

1 3/4 tsp baking powder

1 tsp salt

3/4 cup molasses

2 – 3 tsp blackstrap molasses (optional**)

1/2 cup shortening

* I was surprised to find that the wheat germ in the hippie / health food section of the supermarket was much cheaper than its counterpart in the main store.  I bought some Bob's Red Mill wheat germ at $2.79 per pound.  The stuff over in the cereal section was like $7.50 per pound. 

** I accidentally bought some blackstrap molasses a few weeks ago, thinking “blackstrap” was merely a brand name.  I decided to throw a couple of teaspoons of it into this recipe just to begin to use it up.  

Directions:

Assemble the dry ingredients together and set aside. 

In saucepan, slowly bring molasses to a boil over low heat.   

Remove from heat and add shortening, whisking until melted.  Add heated wet ingredients to dry ingredients and stir well. 

Let cool for at least an hour or so.  (It will rise a little during this time.)

Roll into balls and press down on ungreased cookie sheet with either a fork or the bottom of a drinking glass.  Bake at 350° for 8 minutes or so, depending on the size of the cookies.  (Mine needed 10 or 12 minutes, but I think I made them rather large; next time I'll try smaller ones.) 

Prepare yourself for a wonderful aroma as these bake.  Enjoy with coffee or tea, and a healthy dose of self-righteousness.

Quitter Chronicles: #4 : Phase In

As my stock of foods containing sugar began to dwindle, I started to phase in sugar-free foods and foods sweetened with unrefined sugar. 

Mainly this involved taking care to buy the usual groceries but sticking to options lacking sugar.  For instance, tortilla wraps.  Most brands that I looked at contained high-fructose corn syrup, but I managed to find a couple of brands that didn’t have any sugar listed in the ingredients. 

I also started to make more stuff from scratch, to stock up for when I would need them.  I made hummus and tomato soup and threw them in the freezer.  Instead of buying granola bars, I bought almonds to keep on hand for snacks.  I bought more fruit and veggies that I could conveniently eat raw. 

I wanted to wait until I’d truly begun to live refined-sugar-free before I started eating sweets that were sweetened with raw sugars.  But in preparation, I found some dark chocolate sweetened with raw sugars, and I found a few recipes for desserts that I could make with honey or molasses. 

Basically, my point is that in the weeks leading up to my sugar cleanse, I started easing into a life without sugar.  Simple enough, but I thought I’d tell you, just to tell you.

Too Many Bananas?

With bananas, unlike fresh cilantro, I do not get stressed out about buying a lot at once.  I used to always try to find the smallest bunch of bananas, only getting four or five at a time for fear that they would go brown before I could eat them all.  These days, I always grab the biggest bunch on the shelf, even if they’re already yellow.

See, bananas are pretty versatile.  They make a convenient snack to carry to work or on a hike.  But if they start getting ripe and you start to panic, you can always throw them in the freezer for later use.  You don’t even need to prepare them first.  Just throw them in there in their skins. 

Once they start getting brown, they become perfect for baking.  And if you’re going to cook them anyway, it doesn’t matter that they’re frozen.  You can use the frozen bananas in breads and cakes.

Lately, I’ve been cutting up the frozen bananas and using them in smoothies.  Once again, bananas are proving to be convenient in the sense that I don’t even need to use a whole one each time.  I can cut a frozen one in half or thirds and throw the remainder back in the freezer for later.  The most inconvenient part is that a frozen banana is hard to peel.  If I’m making banana bread, I let it thaw before stripping the skin off (the fruit inside is kind of grossly floppy and soupy in this case, but it’s fine for the purpose at hand, since you usually need to mash it anyway).  If I’m using it for a smoothie, I just use a knife to shave the peel off before throwing it in the blender with some milk, juice, and whatever else. 

This little discovery is so simple, I’m amazed that it took me so long to figure it out.  And it has definitely made the purchase and consumption of bananas way less stressful for this girl who hates wasting food, but often misjudges how much stuff to buy at the store.  

Butternut-Apple Soup

Well, folks, it's Autumn, so it's time to endure the bittersweet wonderfulness of Fall vegetables.  Don't get me wrong, I love Fall veggies.  They just tend to take more energy to prepare, and as you may have noticed, preparing food is agony for me.  Even with my new, fancy Wusthof knife, cutting up the butternut squash for this recipe took forever, and killed. 

A somewhat wise friend once told me that pain has a short memory.  She was right.  A few weeks ago I endured the debilitating torture of cooking and pureeing a tasty Creamy Tomato Soup.  When I finally finished up and curled up in a ball on the floor, I made a mental note not to undertake such big projects again - unless my back improves.  But here I am, reeling from another toilsome afternoon in the kitchen, with the acidy-burny sensation in my back reminding me that I should aspire to smaller tasks.

Anyway, here's the recipe.  I handled this in much the same way as I did the tomato soup, I even froze it in ziplock bags, flat on the freezer floor. 

Butternut-Apple Soup

1 to 3 tsp olive oil

1 large onion, chopped

1 to 3 cloves garlic, minced 

25 to 32 oz. chicken broth

2 butternut squashes (about 5 lbs total), peeled and chopped into 1-inch cubes

2 granny smith apples, peeled and chopped into 1-inch cubes

1 to 2 tsp salt

1/2 to 1 tsp black pepper

In large pot, heat oil.  Add onions, cook until softened.  Add garlic, cook for about a minute.  Add broth, squash, apples, salt and pepper.  Bring to boil, lower to simmer, cook until tender.  Let cool for 5 to 20 minutes before beginning to puree in small batches in food processor. 

At this point, you can either let it cool before dividing into freezer packages, or you can transfer it back into the pot to heat it up to serve. 

 

Famous Last Words

Every so often, around 2 or 3pm, I look at the clock and think, “Huh, I haven’t had too much pain today.”  These are famous last words in my life.  It seems inevitable that about ten minutes after I utter them, the pain begins creeping and settling into my upper back and shoulders. 

Usually grocery shopping is agony for me; all the standing, browsing, carrying unbalanced loads, reading ingredients lists in search of those pesky sugars.  A few months ago, after repeatedly finding myself near tears in the checkout line, I learned that I should always use a shopping cart, regardless of how little I plan to buy.  Shopping carts carry the unbalanced loads without straining my back, and they make good supports when I need to lean on something for a while. 

A few weeks ago I spent about 20 minutes at the supermarket.  I was feeling good enough that I spent some time doing recognizance on natural sweeteners and ingredients lists.  When I got to my car (with my cart) I was pretty amazed at how little pain I was feeling after so long in the store.

Then I got home to my pile of tomatoes, basil and onions, prepared to spend a few hours making a vat of Creamy Tomato Soup.   I started the work of blanching the tomatoes to prepare them to be diced and peeled.  Then I went to work on dicing them and preparing the onions.  After about 15 minutes of work, I thought, “Huh, all this work and I’m not in any pain yet.  Must be a good day.”

Oops.

Then it started. 

Gradually the burning sensation grew stronger and stronger as I added ingredients to the pot.  As the soup was cooking, I went about cleaning up the dishes, knives and cutting boards from preparation, and the pain increased.  I wiped down the counters and limped into the living room where I sprawled out on the hardwood floor watching the clock as the soup simmered. 

The next step was to puree the soup in small batches.  This turned out to be an ordeal.  For all my excitement about owning a food processor, I was not prepared for how messy, disorganized and frustrating this part would be.  In order to dump out the bowl, I had to remove the stubborn blade, splashing soup down the hole and on the spindle.  Wiping down the food processor between batches, ladling the soup into the bowl, removing the bowl and dumping the pureed soup into another bowl, each step sent fire through my muscles. 

Step by step this continued.  I transferred the pureed soup back to the pot, added the milk and tomato paste, and whisked it together. 

By the time I finished transferring the soup into zipper bags, rinsing and labeling them, and stacking them in the freezer, I could hardly believe how much pain I was experiencing.  I finished up washing the dishes and wiping down the counters – I have an ant infestation in my house, so I need to clean things up promptly, otherwise I would have curled up in a ball at this point or earlier – and again I hobbled over to my favorite spot on the hardwood floor.  It was hard even to get down there to rest. 

Looking up at the skylights, feeling the breeze from the windows, sensing some relief from the burning sensation in my shoulder blades, I tried to think of how good it would be after a long day’s work to come home and eat some of that tasty, homemade tomato soup with a slice of bread and maybe some cheese, and I made a mental note to choose easier recipes in the future.  (I bet I'll forget, though.)

Creamy Tomato Basil Soup

This turned out to be a bigger ordeal than I bargained for.  But I think the results will be appreciated – by me – in the weeks to come, since I ended up with enough tomato soup to last me 12 to 15 meals. 

If I keep up with this blog for any real length of time, and if you read many of it’s entries, you will find me repeating this bit of wisdom gleaned from years living alone with chronic pain: Cook large batches of food that can be frozen in one or two serving size containers, and you will thank yourself on those days when you don’t have the energy to fix a meal. 

Many weekends, I devote a big chunk of at least one afternoon to fixing an enormous quantity of some dish that is freezable.  In doing so, I concentrate all the pain and torment of cooking into a few hours, and disperse the food and enjoyment over several weeks. 

I found a recipe similar to this in a cookbook given to me by a friend.  I made a double batch and a few changes.  Because the second-to-final stage involves whisking cold milk into the soup, I was able to quickly transfer the end product into freezer bags and throw it in the freezer without waiting for it to cool.

You'll notice that my measurements are pretty arbitrary, I tend to tweak recipes as I go based on how much of each ingredient I have on hand and how much energy I feel I have for all the preparations.  For example, I put quite a bit more basil in this than the original recipe called for, mainly because I had a pretty hefty bunch of basil to use up and didn't want to waste it.  

Here’s the recipe:

2 – 5 tbsp olive oil.

1 – 3 onions.

2 – 5 garlic cloves minced. 

8 -12 large, ripe tomatoes; peeled and diced.

2 – 3 cups chicken broth.

4 -6 tbsp fresh basil leaves.

6 cups milk (I like to use whole or 2%, fat makes food taste good).

6 oz can tomato paste.

Salt and black pepper to taste. 

Heat oil in large sauce pan / stew pot.  Cook onions until softened.  Add tomatoes, broth, garlic, and about ½ tsp salt and ¼ tsp black pepper.  Bring to boil, then lower to simmer for about 10 minutes, or until everything is tender. 

Puree in small batches with basil leaves.  (You could also save the basil leaves till the very end, adding them [finely chopped] as you’re warming up the soup to serve it.)

When entire batch is pureed, transfer back to pot, adding tomato paste and milk.  Now would be a good time to taste it and see if it needs more salt and pepper. 

Now you can either transfer the soup to containers for freezing, or warm it up to serve it.  When warming it up, be sure to avoid boiling it.  Because it contains milk, it will get that gross film on top if it gets too hot.

I froze this soup in zip-lock bags, flat on the freezer floor.  Once the bags freeze, you can move them around in the freezer.  Because they end up thin and rectangular, it can be really convenient. 

I also made sure to label the bags.  In addition to the name of the dish, I like to write instructions to myself on how to serve the food.  In this case, the soup is ready to eat.  I just need to thaw and heat it.  Sometimes I’ll write something like, “Serve with pasta,” or “add carrots.”  

If I'd thought ahead, I would have labeled the bags before I filled them.  My handwriting was much messier than usual because I wrote on a bag filled with liquid!

Quitter Chronicles: #3 : The Slow Purge

Slow Purge.

After spending a few days making mental notes of all the foods I ate that contained refined sugar, I decided the next step would be to begin to slowly purge my house of this sweet menace.  All those foods in my pantry containing sugar would have to go.  But I neither wanted to toss them nor give them away – they cost me a lot of money, and there were a lot of them! 

In my mind, the first logical step was to avoid purchasing anything containing refined sugar – at least significant quantities of such items.  I stopped buying granola bars, pasta sauces, crackers, salad dressings, etc.  By refraining from adding sugary foods to my stockpile, I figured it would be much easier to focus on ridding my cupboards of the stuff that was already there.

The second step was to use what I had.  I began to widdle away at the banana bread and muffins I’d so wisely frozen.  The sweet and sour sauce I bought for emergencies went into a stir-fry.  The remaining granola bars got packed in my work snack stash.  Even the sausage in my freezer went in a quiche, and the Italian sausage stew I made served it’s purpose as a convenient meal.  I even managed to finish off my Swiss Miss hot chocolate in the month of July.  And yes, I will confess that I binged on “m&m’s” that I had bought on sale after Easter. 

At first this process seemed really daunting.  I had a lot of sugary stuff to get rid of and was mildly afraid of putting on a few pounds in my efforts to eat it all before I started my cleanse.   Seemed counterproductive.  But, first of all, I don’t think I ended up eating much more sugar in those weeks than I normally did when I wasn’t concerned about sugar.  And secondly, as the weeks passed, the task became more encouraging because I saw that my supply of sugary stuff was dwindling markedly. 

In the end I did end up giving away a bunch of stuff like raspberry jam and Marshmallow Fluff.  And, sadly, I ended up donating a good amount of Cadbury eggs and Hershey Kisses to my coworkers.  But with a few days remaining before my scheduled start for my sugar cleanse, my pantry and freezer were clear of high-fructose corn syrup and white sugar. 

End of Day Cooking

Lying on the living room floor after work, in my mind I walk through the steps involved in making the quiche I’ve been putting off all week.  I’ll have to cut up the sausage, whisk the eggs, thaw the spinach, and shred the cheese.  I’ll have to wash the dishes and wipe down the counters afterward.  I’m pretty sure the compost bucket is full; afterwards I should bring that out. 

Here on the floor it seems like too much to bear.  All those steps.  All that standing.  All those details. 

I wanted to make quiche because I imagined it would be simple and quick.  The sausage needs to get used up, and it’s been out of the freezer for a few days.  Time’s-a-wasting.  It would be good to get this done and out of the way. 

One.  Two.  Three.  I hoist myself up and move into the kitchen.  Mechanically I go through the steps: chopping, shredding, assembling, whisking – – Ignore the burning in your shoulder blade – – I cut corners on the fresh herbs because I just don’t have the stamina to deal with them.  Not noticing the size of the holes in the peppershaker, I pour way too much into the egg mixture.  I swear out loud.  Add another egg and a little more milk – – Ignore the tingling numbness in your arm – – I pour the eggs over the rest – – Just a few more minutes and you can lie down again – – Into the oven it goes – – The home stretch.

Wait.  Ants!  I should probably wash the dishes and wipe down the counters before the ants come out in droves to scavenge among my dirty dishes – – Ignore the stabbing in your ribcage – – Water in the basin, I soak and scrub the knives and forks and bowls and cutting board – – Just a little longer and you can lie down.

Dishes washed, counters cleared, quiche in oven, I seek refuge on the hardwood floor and stare at the ceiling for a few seconds before curling up on my left side, and wait. 

Quitter Chronicles: #2 : Inventory

Inventory.

After deciding to try to cut refined sugars out of my diet, I spent a couple of days paying attention to what I ate.  I did this very casually with no extensive notes or anything like that.  I just made mental notes of the foods in my pantry that contained sugar. 

Some were surprising.  Pasta sauce and salsa.  Vitamin C and Calcium supplements.  Half & Half.  Salty crackers. 

Some were obvious.  Granola bars.  Peanut butter cups.  Sweet & sour sauce. 

Then I paid attention to stuff I ate at restaurants, or things that people at work shared with me.  Probably that dressing on that salad at that restaurant has sugar.  That cupcake my coworker made definitely did.  I wonder about the dough on that pizza.

Step one in my sugar cleanse was merely to think about sugar and where it lurks.  It was eye opening, and afterwards I felt a little better equipped for the road ahead.